Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
