So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
