I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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