Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize