fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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