The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
