happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Randomize