Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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