yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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