I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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