At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
