He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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