Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
