How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
