i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
organizing the empties. That sober.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
