I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
