I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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