It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Randomize