But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
