Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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