Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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