I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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