Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
this will be a night to untag.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
