The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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