And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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