I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
