And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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