Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
