no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
