is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
