She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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