brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
