You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize