the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
