Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
false alarm. still invincible.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
