I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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