he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Randomize