rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize