PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
