wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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