also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
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