I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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