carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize
