At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
