Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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