You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
it wasn't lemon gatorade
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
