there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
