I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Randomize
