i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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