hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Is it penis luge time yet?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
