hell yes lets make some ravioli
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Quick, to the slutcave!
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
