I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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